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According to Da Paper this morning, Tim Tebow (maybe you’ve heard of him? young fella from Florida?) makes that dirty bum Drew Brees look like the demonchild of Chris Brown and Roman Polanski.

“The dashing face of college football is the anti-Tiger Woods,” the T-P tells us, and “Sometimes, it seems that there is a ‘Tim Tebow,’ who exists apart from the person — Mother Teresa in eye black with a devastating jump pass.”

You want more? They got more (except, oddly enough, the famous story about Tebow’s 2008 spring break trip, which he spent circumsizing orphans in the Philippines while wearing Gator-colored Crocs).

Here’s a list of encomiums from other sportswriters and coaches (”I’d never bet against Tim Tebow. He’s a winner, period. That guy’s a stud. S-T-U-D. Stud.” — unsurprisingly, Jon Gruden), as well as a list of the Bible verses Tebow wears on his eyeblack and what they mean (yes, seriously).

For Valor in Sports Reporting Pander, we hereby present today’s T-P sports section with the Holy Tebow Grilled Cheese Sandwich:

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